To Jack........

"The presence of your absense is everywhere."

I see you everywhere. I see you in my arms or in your daddy's arms.  Now that the days are so beautiful, I long to put you in your stroller and take you for a walk.  When I lay my head on my pillow, I sometimes close my eyes and reach out my arms....I imagine myself cuddling you. 

When I was pregnant with you, I used to tell everyone how BLESSED I was because I got to take you EVERYWHERE.  That is such an amazing feeling!!! Thank you, baby boy, for giving that to me. 

I know that you are present....I know that you are still with me.....you are always within me!!!

You are the love of my life, sweet boy!!!!

One Year Ago......February 20th

One year ago.....I was given one of God's greatest blessings.  Tim asks me how I know.....I just do. 

I recently came across another mommy's blog and she was talking about the book written by Robert Munsch, I'll Love You, Forever.  This is a book that I have always loved.  I can remember first reading it when my nephew Alex was born, years ago.  I have come to love it even more now knowing that the author wrote it for his two babies who were born sleeping. 

So, on this one year anniversary of a magical night......I will light a candle for my precious Jack.....and whisper these words to him.....

      I'll love you forever....
      I'll like you for always....
      As long as I'm living....
      My baby you'll be.

I imagine that God is cradling Jack in his arms or maybe my sweet Nanny....as I whisper to him....

     I'll love you forever...
     I'll like you for always....
     As long as I'm living....
     My baby you'll be.


I true love you, my sweet baby boy!!!

Three Months....

Happy 3 months in Heaven, Baby Jack!!

I can't believe you have been gone from me for three months.  I love you so much and think about you every moment. I know that you are with me in my heart and in my soul.  As each day passes, it makes mommy so sad because it means that you have been away from me for one more day. Daddy tells me that you wouldn't want me to be so sad all the time.  I am really, really trying.  Tomorrow Mommy and Shelly are going to send up three balloons to you for your three month birthday.  We will be writing you a love message so be sure to grab them!!!  Do you remember last month when all the kids in mommy's class sent balloons to you?  It was such a windy and blustery day.  Mommy was carrying all 25 balloons and almost got blown away.  I closed my eyes and wished and hoped that those balloons would lift me off the ground and carry me to you in heaven.  How wonderful that would be!!!!!

Baby Jack, you are the love of mommy's life!!!! 

Dreams....

Today I heard a song on the radio that I once loved....it has new meaning for me now.....

    Every night in my dreams....
    I see you, I feel you
    That is how I know you go on....

    Far across the distance
    and spaces between us
    You have come to show you go on.......

To my Baby Jack......you are just as I dreamed of....see you in my dreams tonight
You're the love of my life!!!!